So my daughter is going to be 18 in just a few months and per our agreement she can get her own place upon her turning 18. I am so sad to see her go but I am also excited to see her take the next step into becoming an adult.
So how do you do it? How do you carry them in your belly for 9 months, watch them as they learn to talk and walk and become the little people that they are now? How do I watch her walk out the door? OH I dont even know how to feel most days. She is still my little girl with her big silly grin and her dark chocolate brown eyes saying pees and tank ou. She is graduated from high school and is now in college and becoming an adult right before my eyes. It makes me want to cry sometimes because I am so not ready to see her go. I do depend on her a lot but it is so much more than that. She is my little girl. She is my friend. She is my sanity when the world is crazy.
I am afraid for her to go out into the world. I want to keep her safe and know that no matter what she is taken care of and always has a safe place to sleep. She has a good head on her shoulders and knows that the world isnt the kindest of places but she is so young. God was I that young? Was I really only 2 years older then she is now when I became her mother? Has it been so long when it feels like it was just yesterday that the doctors introduced me to that slimy little squeaker?
Oh I dont know if I am ready for her to move on to the next step of her life. I am so ready to watch her become the woman I know she will be but at the same time I really will miss my little girl.
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Isn't this the struggle we face as parents from the very beginning? I'm not there yet - my oldest just turned 5... But, with each passing day, they become a bit more independent and need us just a little bit less. I can't imagine the day he's ready to move out, and yet, I'm working to mold him into a responsible adult, ready to move out and contribute to society. Sigh... such interesting thoughts. (())
ReplyDeleteShannon, My daughter turned 18 last march. I thank God that she is going to college close to home and living at home. I don't think i'll ever let her go.
ReplyDeleteI cannot imagine what you are going through. When my oldest turned nine, I cried because I knew that half of her life under my roof was gone. May God give me grace when I reach where you are. I will pray that He gives you grace and strength now. Blessings.
ReplyDeleteI have been there and it is scary but she will be fine. You say she has a good head on her shoulders - well that is the things you have taught her. When my daughter went to college it was a tough thing, but she was only an hour away. Now my little girl is getting married on the 27th of Oct. in Italy. She will be one month away from her 25th birthday.
ReplyDeleteKeep yourself busy!!! You will be OK!
Thank you all so much. I keep looking at her and thinking to myself that I only have months left. It is so silly because she will still be in the same town as me so it wont be hours away just to see her....I am just not ready to let her go.
ReplyDeleteugh. i'm sorry. i have two daughters and the thought of them turning 18 just breaks my heart. my husband is different, i swear he's counting the days. but i tell him that we will NOT be tossing our girls out on their 18th birthday. nope. no way.
ReplyDeletelearning from my own experiences and what makes me feel better when thinking of my girls...i hope that they will be going to a college like a big state university and experiencing that. i didn't make that a priority myself and really am sad that i didn't get to experience the fun of university life. plus it seems to be a halfway point between home with me and out on their own. so that is what i'm hoping for.
plus, i think back to my younger years. i seriously thought i knew it all. and even kept that attitude well into my 20's. guess what? i didn't know much at all! so to me, that magical age of 18 doesn't mean much to me. i don't think i actually "grew up" until about 24 or 25 and only then because i was becoming a mom.
all that being said, i feel for you. and just remember that a daughter will always need her mommy. even if she doesn't think so. she does.
Oh Shannon, your little girl is still tucked inside that taller package.
ReplyDeleteI know (kind of) how hard it is to see them go. I also know how hard it is to stay in the moment. Every moment that she is safe, is a good one.
And all the moments from now leading up to her actually turning 18 are feeling more and more like a gift, from what I'm hearing you say.
Your fears are genuine, as is your heart.
You've been tagged!
ReplyDeleteJust getting to this post now. You know what? They never stop being your kid..even when they're in their mid 20s and early 30s. They just become more independent and then they become your bestest friends. You'll still have many proud mom moments. Good luck!
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